You are so right. I stayed married and unhappy for a long time — too long. After 44 years (yes, 44 years), I needed out. Now, about the kids — my ex and I did no service for our kids by staying together. My son, in his 30’s, is single. When I told him I was getting divorced, his words to me were “what took you so long. You were unhappy for so long.” My daughter said the exact same thing. That is bad enough but my son went on to tell me that he never wants to get married after seeing how it was for his mom and me. Staying in an unhappy marriage hurts the kids in unimaginable ways. I also hate the glib advice to “make your marriage work for the good of the kids.” As if it is possible to change how you feel towards your partner. It’s b.s. When a relationship is really dead, it is dead and there is no bringing it back to life. The best thing parents can do for their kids is be caring and happy.